Entering into a surrogacy arrangement is an exciting time for both intended parents and their gestational surrogate. Understandably, expectations on both sides will be high, and everyone will want to feel confident that their preferences for the surrogacy journey are being respected. We have provided this guide for both parties to help ensure that everyone feels they are truly getting the most out of the arrangement. We hope intended parents and surrogates will consider our recommendations below prior to the matching process.
1. Be honest.
It’s very important for both parties to be honest about what they hope the surrogate journey will entail. If you prefer an arrangement where communication is frequent, then we recommend that you let that be known during the matching process. If there’s anything you disagree with or a point of contention, it’s best to work through it rather than rushing past it to make the matching process go faster. This makes it more likely that everyone will have the highest-quality match possible so the relationship between the parties is positive. Suppressing how you really feel about the arrangement will not create the best possible match for either the surrogate or intended parent.
2. Keep expectations reasonable.
Surrogacy is an amazing process, and it’s important to remember that it’s a human-driven process. Both the surrogate and intended parents will have a lot of expectations about how they want things to go throughout the pregnancy and delivery. Expectations are okay to have, but it’s best if everyone remembers to keep them reasonable and that flexibility may be called for. Pregnancy and childbirth are areas of life that are known for being unpredictable, so there may be times when going with the flow is the best way to work through any challenges that may arise. This doesn’t mean you have to sacrifice how you feel, especially if something is a high priority, but being open-minded will be helpful to everyone.
3. Don’t forget to celebrate!
Surrogacy is full of exciting milestones — when you’re first matched, when a pregnancy is achieved, having the first ultrasound, seeing the growth and development of the baby, making plans for childbirth, and finally, the delivery. The process asks a great deal of surrogates mentally, physically, and emotionally; intended parents also experience their own stresses. Celebrating each milestone as it comes is as important as achieving the milestone in the first place. The surrogacy process deserves celebration anytime good news can be shared.
If you’re interested in becoming a surrogate or finding a surrogate to help you build your family, please contact Fertility Source Companies.