Relationships are tricky no matter what type they are; marriage, co-workers, and family all have certain expectations when it comes to how a relationship should be between the people involved. Society may have one general expectation but each individual, race and religion also has their own thoughts and feelings on the subject as well. It’s very complicated when you really think about all of the different relationships out there. So let’s fold in surrogacy where one woman is carrying a baby for another person or couple. What is that relationship supposed to be like? How is it all ‘managed’?
Society still is having problems with their thinking on this subject! Just read the news where the focus is the ‘womb for rent’ or ‘selling body parts’ or the ‘exploitation of women’ when the subject of surrogacy arises. The reality is that there is a very real relationship between the Intended Parent(s) and the surrogate mother and her family. What needs to be acknowledged is the fact that the communication that happens is not between the growing fetus and the surrogate but between the Intended Parent(s) and their surrogate mother. Working together toward a shared goal, building a family, is a great foundation for a wonderful relationship between all parties…and not a superficial one either. An evolving relationship which will take some work and guidance at times.
This is where a good agency can come into play. A surrogacy agency is the backbone of any great intended parent / surrogate mother relationship. The case manager knows all parties involved and works closely with everyone. From the first introduction, through the signing of the contracts and the embryo transfer, a good case manager will be supporting the relationship between surrogate mother and intended parent(s) in every way she can. During the pregnancy, birth, and even after the baby arrives safely home, the surrogacy agency is there to share, guide and lead the surrogate mother and intended parents through the process of building a relationship that could potentially last for many years to come.