Choosing an Egg Donor
Selecting an egg donor is one of the hardest decisions you will ever face. With so many different factors to consider during the donor selection process, it is important to think about what qualities mean the most to you and your partner. At The Donor SOURCE we’ve gathered our best, time-tested advice to help you begin the donor selection process. Below are some important considerations when choosing an egg donor:
Anonymous vs. Known Egg Donor
The first decision you need to make is whether you want a “known egg donor” or “anonymous egg donor”. A known donor is when a close relative or friend is the egg donor, as well as an egg donor chosen through an egg donor database that agrees to direct contact with you. Some prefer to use a known donor because this gives the child an opportunity to form a relationship with their donor. Some drawbacks are that legal guidelines for known donors are less clear-cut and it can be stressful defining a known donor’s role in your child’s life. An anonymous egg donor, is a donor found through an egg donor database who does not reveal their identity to the intended parents. The egg donation agency or fertility center serves as the point of contact with the donor. Using an anonymous donor provides more confidentiality and a clearly defined relationship with the donor. At The Donor SOURCE, the majority of our matches are anonymous in nature but we have plenty of experience matching families with a known egg donor. Whichever you decide, we will help guide you through the egg donor process.
One of the most important donor considerations for many couples or individuals, is physical appearance. If everyone in your family has blue eyes, tan skin and brown hair, then finding those qualities in a donor may be very important to you. If appearance is not a major concern, your options will be much broader. We supply both current and childhood photos to help when physical appearance is important.
When reviewing donor profiles it is crucial to evaluate their medical history carefully. How does the donor’s medical history combine with your own family’s history? Certain factors in a male’s medical history make some donors more compatible than others.
If you’re choosing an anonymous egg donor, it can be advantageous to match your blood type with the donors. This will allow you to donate blood to your child should the need ever arise and also affords you greater privacy. Some parents are not sure if they will tell their child about using an egg donor. If the child’s blood type is not a possible combination of the mother’s and father’s blood type, this creates an opportunity for the child to discover they are not 100% biologically related.
When you’re looking through donor profiles try to gain a sense of the donor’s personality. How the donor answers questions such as ‘What is your favorite sport?’ can give you more insight into her personality than whether or not she says soccer or lacrosse. We recommend choosing a donor that you can relate to or feel that you could be friends with.
Are Repeat Donors Better?
Repeat Donors are women who have gone through the egg donation process once or several times already. Using a repeat donor can be reassuring for intended parents because the donor has already completed the process once before, truly understands what is involved, and responded well to the medication. Using a repeat donor over a first-time donor does not necessarily guarantee success, but it does offer some advantages.
Location of Donor
Once the donor search has been narrowed down to a select few candidates, location becomes an important consideration. At The Donor SOURCE we have egg donors and case managers located throughout the nation in order to provide everyone with the best opportunities possible. If you are on a strict budget we recommend searching for local donors first and then if you don’t find a suitable match, looking on a national scale.
Dealing with Stress
Remember that it’s OK to be emotional during this process. Struggling with infertility is a challenging experience and the donor selection process can be stressful. At The Donor SOURCE our Case Managers are highly trained to help you reach your goals and find an excellent donor with compassionate, attentive care. If you have any questions or concerns, know that we are always here to listen. You may contact us at any time!
Follow Your Instincts
At The Donor SOURCE we have an extensive database filled with donors that want to help a loving couple or individual become parents. When looking at donor profile after profile, it can be easy to get caught up in finding someone that matches everything on your checklist. Try not to focus too much on one specific trait. Whether that includes height, eye color, ethnicity, Ivy League schools, or additional characteristics. Parents who loosely follow their checklist and select a donor ‘that feels just right’ are typically the happiest in the long run. It is important to feel a connection to your donor!
How to Get Started
To start the donor selection process, sign up for access to our egg donation database. An easy way to start your search is to find a group of donors that meet the physical characteristics of your family. Then candidates can be narrowed down by medical history, donor personality, location, proven donors or more. At the end of the day, everyone’s selection process is unique. There’s no right or wrong way to choose your donor! If you have any questions, please don’t hesitate to contact us. We are happy to help!